Jim Dumps Robin!

First of all, if you don’t listen to the Howard Stern show, then this post is meaningless to you. Go get your head out of your ass and buy a Sirius Satellite system right now. For those of you that are fans, here’s a recap of what happened on Monday’s show.

On the Howard Stern Show today (Sirius Satellite Radio), Howard’s African American sidekick for over 20 years (and his news woman) Robin Quivers announced that she was dumped by Stern regular and hack comedian, Jim Florentine. Jim, 15 years Robin’s junior has been dating Robin for around a year now and it has been a huge topic of conversation on the popular message board Stern Fan Network. Ms. Quiver’s big beautiful black breasts and vagina has been the target of hundreds of song parodies, jokes, and extreme sexual harassment which has been pure radio gold to millions of fans worldwide.

At first Jim’s true intentions were at question at the beginning of their relationship. Getting plugs and notiarity from the Stern show has proven to be extremely profitable for any guest, musician, or comedian so Jim’s interest in Robin was a bit controversial. Was it to further his career? Robin was highly criticized for dating Jim due to his immature nature involving excessive flatulence in public (that’s farting for you retards), boyish antics, and not being a polished member of society. Some would call him semi-retarded. They seemed to keep their relationship private, even with Howard digging out tidbits of updates from time to time, and masterfully piecing it all together and psychoanalyzing as an amateur therapist.

Jim Florentine is best known as the voice of Special Ed from the Comedy Central show, Crank Yankers. It’s basically a show with phony phone calls coming from funny looking retarded, drunk, and trashy puppets. I have the dvd box set….very funny stuff. Us puppets stick together.

So on Monday’s show before the news, the annoying and untalented Greg Fitzsimmons was siting in, they played a funny Robin-Jim song before Robin started reading the news. She abruptly announced that they were no longer together. Howard must have been a little annoyed since the show was going a little long, he was obviously tired and wanted to leave, and this topic (which would be a 5 hour show in itself) was brought up. She mentioned he broke up with her and she seemed a little shaken by it. I imagine this will be the first then they talk about tomorrow.

Here’s Starmuscle.com’s theories. Robin is used to having her ass kissed by everyone. She’s a cackling diva bitch that has significantly loses what little talent she did have year after year. She’s annoying, has a piercing nervous laugh which makes you hate ALL women. She has been extremely threatened by the addition of Artie Lange over the past 7 years and really doesn’t contribute to the show as much as Howard pumps her up to be an important part of the show. Jim on the other hand, is a man’s man. No not a homo, he’s a normal guy that loves life. He’s funny, down to earth and extremely talented. Robin’s negative energy and constant elitism was too much of a drain on Jim. Anyways, that’s just our theory, you can post a comment below.

Welcome to the weekend summary of Starmuscle.com’s celebrity gossip. It was a pretty light weekend, we seem to be a little heavy on the Madonna news. That old bat just won’t leave. Maybe she will become a robot and live forever like Darth Vader. Anyways here’s your celebrity gossip for the end of July 2008. I kissed a girl and I liked it celebrity gossip.

Mark Walhberg Is Getting Married:
MARK WAHLBERG stunned fans at the Comic-Com comic book convention at the weekend (26Jul08) after revealing his marriage plans. The Planet of The Apes star was at the four-day event promoting upcoming film Max Payne when things got personal and the actor explained he was planning to wed his longtime girlfriend Rhea Durham, who is expecting the couple’s third child. He said, “We continue to grow in our relationship and I think we have a much better chance at succeeding and staying together.” I just saw the story of Marky Mark on VH1 and man-o-man Marky Mark clawed his way to fame, from free basing coke at age 13 to countless arrests for racial fighting and theft. Under that soft smile and boyish charm, there is a hard hard man….no pun intended.

Whitney Houston Song Leaked On The Net:
WHITNEY HOUSTON’s comeback single has been leaked on to the internet.The eagerly-anticipated track - Like I Never Left - featuring R+B heavyweight Akon, made its way online this weekend (26/27Jul08).The song’s title is reportedly in reference to the diva’s absence from the music scene in recent years. Houston hasn’t released a track since 2003’s One Wish. In the song, Houston tells her fans, “Yes, your girl is coming back”. Mama needs her crack, she better get on tour fast. Bobby…ba ba ba bobby brown.

Shia LaBeouf Arrest / Broke His Hand:
Shia LaBeouf, who was arrested for drunk driving Sunday after being involved in a car accident in Hollywood, is recovering from surgery, his rep said in a statement. What an idiot! How did this kid get the Transformers movie and THEN the Indiana Jones movie?! Now he acts like an idiot, endangers people’s lives with his drunk driving, and now isn’t able to work for at least a month. what an asshole. I am anti-nerd characters in movies too. It tells kids that being mediocre or a nerd is ok or cool.

Madonna Poisons Gerard Butler:
Actor GERARD BUTLER was given a vitamin shot by MADONNA on the set of her husband’s movie ROCKNROLLA - but it left him severely ill. The Scottish star fell ill while filming for Guy Ritchie’s upcoming gangster film, so the singer offered him a concentrated vitamin jab. But despite Madonna’s good intentions, the injection failed to boost Butler’s immune system - and left him feeling worse than before. Look at the crypt keeper, Madonna. Would you follow any advice or health tips that old bag would offer? Also Madonna’s acting again? Oh boy more steamy piles of shit that will be on the shelves of Blockbuster, yeah baby!

Batman Beats The $$$$ Record:
The BATMAN BEGINS sequel THE DARK KNIGHT has set another record at the U.S. box office by becoming the first film to pass the $300 million in just 10 days.The film became the first movie to hit the $200 million mark in five days after breaking all opening-weekend box office records last week (20Jul08).Thanks to a staggering $75.6 million ($37.8 million) secondweekend take, the Batman film has racked up over $314 million since its release in America 10 days ago. It took previous record holder Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Man’s Chest 16 days to pass the $300 million mark in 2006. I am finally going to see this movie tonite, I can’t wait.

Madonna To Renew Wedding Voes
Wow, Guy Richie and Madonna must have an open marriage (her banging A-Rod) because Madonna is renewing her wedding voes in a Kabbalah ceremony next month (Aug08), according to London reports. Despite claims the couple’s marriage is on the rocks, Madonna and Ritchie will host a Shabbat Nachamu event to show family and friends they are still very much a couple. RUN GUY RUN RUN GUY RUN! Say NO this time!

The Golden Girls star Estelle Getty has died of dementia, just three days before her 85th birthday. (Wow I thought she was 85 when she was on Golden Girls!? )She passed away in the early hours of Tuesday morning at her Los Angeles, California home. The actress had endured a long battle with Lewy Body Dementia, a disease exhibiting symptoms similar to Alzheimer’s Disease and Parkinson’s. Born in New York in 1923, Getty began her acting career with a small part in 1978 comedy Team-mates. She went on to land roles in 1982 classic Tootsie and 1985’s Mask, but it was her turn as wise-cracking Sicilian mother Sophia Petrillo on 1980s sitcom The Golden Girls that made her a household name. She is also known for her stint on New York’s Broadway in a 1982 production of Torch Song Trilogy. Getty later starred in movies including Stuart Little, Throw Momma From The Train and Mannequin. Paying tribute to the star, her longtime care-giver Paul Chapdelaine says, “Sadly, today July 22, 2008 at 5:35 a.m. Pacific Time, we said our last good-byes to our little friend Estelle, who passed away and made her journey to the great beyond. Although it was a trip that she never wanted to take, she went gracefully, in the comfort of her own home, surrounded by her family and her very loving care-givers. Estelle’s legacy will live on and on through the comedy and laughter she gave to us all, which will forever keep us laughing out loud… Estelle was a fighter. She always stood up for the underdogs, fought for equality for all, and always pictured a world filled with “Love and Laughter” - her most favourite catch phrase. Estelle, we love you and will miss you dearly. We pray that you are met at the Pearly Gate with open arms and a warm welcome by all who have passed before you…. You have touched my life, and the lives of so many others who will never forget you.” The Golden Globe and Emmy award-winning actress is survived by two adult sons from her marriage to Arthur Gettleman. He passed away in 2004.

Batman star Christian Bale has been arrested on allegations of assault, British police said Tuesday. Wow, I wonder what the real back-story for this is. Christian Bale was accused of assaulting mother and sister, for Christ’s sake. Starmuscle.com thinks it has to do with seething jealousy over the thunder Heath Ledger is receiving for his performance as the Joker. British media earlier reported that Bale’s mother and sister complained they were assaulted by the 34-year-old actor at the Dorchester Hotel in London on Sunday night, a day before the European premiere of “The Dark Knight.” The women made the allegation at a local police station in southern England on Monday, the Press Association news agency said. It said the allegation was then passed on to the Metropolitan Police in London. Asked whether Bale had been questioned, a police spokeswoman did not refer to him by name but said: “A 34-year-old man attended a central London police station this morning by appointment and was arrested in connection with an allegation of assault.”

I wonder if Christian Bale went ballistic on his mom and sister because they liked Heath Ledger’s performance much more than Christian’s in the Batman movie.

Christian Bale Is Jealous Of The Joker

Here’s some possible Christian Bale quotes the night he got arressted: (that Starmuscle.com has zero proof is real).

“You like Heath?! Heath?! that junkie couldn’t act his way out of a wet paper bag”.
“The movie is BATMAN, not the F’n Joker. This is my time to shine, not that retarded corpse’s”
“Mom, you thought the movie WAS OKAY???, OKAY? I studied jujitsu 7 hrs a day for 9 months, OKAY!????. I am going to choke you now”
“My own sister and mom thinks I could have done better. I am now going to assault you”

I wonder if any of those fake quotes have any realness to them. We’ll keep you posted.

Zany U.S. funnyman Andy Dick has been arrested on suspicion of drug possession and sexual battery. Police picked the comic up in Murieta, California early on Wednesday morning after revellers at a local bar reported Dick’s inappropriate behaviour. He was caught with some unprescribed Xanax and marijuana and was clearly intoxicated. They told the authorities he had pulled a 17-year-old female’s T-shirt and bra down to expose her breasts after leaving the bar. Police stopped Dick and friends as they drove away from the establishment in a truck. The intoxicated comedian was booked at a nearby police station and remains in custody as Wenn went to press. I feel bad for Andy. I personally feel he is a genius that is more oftenly misunderstood since his dark sarcasm is believed to be his real personality. In 50 years after he is long dead he will be remembered as a comedian way ahead of his time that pushed the social envelope to the max. Best of luck Andy, don’t listen to all the haters out there. What do you all think of Andy Dick?

Andy Dick Arrested

Happy 4th people! We hope you are reading this celebrity garbage AFTER the fourth of July. Get off the computer, go outside, cook up some hotdogs and hang out with your family. There is some celebrity fireworks in Hollywood for sure. Enjoy your Fourth of July gossip:

Madonna Officially States there will be No Divorce
Madonna has finally broken her silence about her alleged affair with Alex Rodriguez. In an exclusive statement to People magazine Madonna says,
My husband and I are not planning on getting a divorce. I know Alex Rodriguez through Guy Oseary, who manages both of us. I brought my kids to a Yankee game. I am not I am not romantically involved in any way with Alex Rodriguez. I have nothing to do with the state of his marriage or what spiritual path he may choose to study. This dude can get any woman he wants. Why would he even want a dried up old hag like Madonna. Word on the street is that Madonna likes to wear strapon dildos with her partners, is A-Rod taking a mini bat to the butt? Starmuscle.com will keep you posted.

‘Crocodile Dundee’ is Wanted for Tax Evasion
Paul Hogan (a.k.a. Crocodile Dundee) is being investigated by Australian authorities for tax evasion. According to The Australian national newpaper, Australian tax authorities have asked the U.S. Internal Revenue Service for help in obtaining Hogan’s U.S. banking records and four of Hogan’s companies have already been ordered to turn over documents. Hogan’s lawyer, David Rydon, says that Australian officials can not lawfully obtain Hogan’s records and Hogan is fighting the IRS’s involvement. That money is LONG spent, do I smell another Croc movie? Maybe he should team up with Harrison Ford and do an Indiana Jones / Crocodile Hunter merger movie….from an old folks home.

Britney Spears Might Join Madonna’s ‘Sticky & Sweet’ Tour.
Rumor is Madonna has asked Britney Spears to join her on tour.Apparently Madonna feels that it will help resurrect Britney’s career if she appears on the Sticky & Sweet Tour. However, if Britney does perform it will only be on some of the dates not the entire tour. Sticky and Sweet, more like “Dried up and Sour”. This is a big YAWWWWWWWWWWWWWN.

John Edwards’ Daughter Caught Drunk in Public
On the night of July 4th, Catharine Elizabeth (’Cate’) Edwards, the elder daughter of John Edwards, the 2004 nominee for Vice President of the United States from the Democratic Party, was sitting reading the fine print of a Public Intoxication ticket, instead of watching the fireworks commemorate the birth of the country her father wanted to help run. I wonder if this hurts the chances of Edwards being nominated for the Vice Presidency card with Barack Obama.

Former San Diego Charger Terrence Kiel Dies in a Car Accident
Terrence Kiel a former safety for the San Diego Chargers was killed in a car accident late Friday night.Kiel was reportedly driving his car on the wrong side of the road when it struck a wall. He was ejected from the vehicle and pinned under the hood. Kiel was barely breathing when medical personnel arrived and was pronounced dead an hour later at 11:28 pm. Terrence had just left a party where his friends had pleaded with him not to drive home. However, police will not know whether or not drugs or alcohol played a role in the accident until toxicology tests are performed. Friends don’t let friends drive drunk. Thank God he didn’t hit anyone.

Ashley Dupre Drops Lawsuit Against ‘Girls Gone Wild’s’ Joe Francis
Ashley Alexandrea Dupre has decided to drop her $10 million lawsuit against Joe Francis on Thursday, July 3rd. She claims that the dropped was a way to “eliminate all negativity from her life and focus on the positive.�? According to her lawyer Richard C. Wolfe, She has prospects for many exciting new projects. Starmuscle.com smells a settlement.

Cynthia Rodriguez, A-Rod’s Wife Blames Madonna for Their Break Up
Cynthia Rodriguez is blaming Madonna and her religion, Kabbalah, for breaking up her 5 year marriage to A-Rod. A-Rod, who plays for the New York Yankees, has been spotted making late night visits to Madonna’s apartment that date back as early as the day his 2nd child was born. Madonna calls her vagina a Kabbalah? I never heard that one. Guy Richie is a complete pushover, take a stand man, stop being a pussy.

Miley Cyrus has a New Boy Toy!
15 year old Miley Cyrus sure does move on quickly. Just last month it was rumored that she was dating her 22 year old back up dancer, Marshall, and now she is being linked to 17 year old Lucas Till. Lucas plays Miley’s on screen boyfriend in Disney’s Hannah Montana movie. The moment Miley saw Lucas’ photo, she knew he was perfect to play her on screen love. Once they began shooting, she totally fell for him. It was as if she decided she wanted him and she would have him-Lucas had no choice in the matter. I wonder if Miley has new boyfriends sign a confidentially agreement prior to getting to first base.

Christina Applegate’s Ex-Boyfriend is Found Dead
26 year old Lee Grivas was found dead in the living room of his Hollywood apartment on Tuesday, July 1st.According to the National Enquirer, “Applegate and Grivas, a 26 year old skateboarder and photographer, has a rocky on-again, off-again relationship due to his continual battle with drugs and alcohol.