2008 February | Famous Ladies – Celeb Babes Getting dirty

SEAN ‘DIDDY’ COMBS is furious after he was barred from moving in to a luxurious New York apartment building unless he agreed to a list of demands from the neighbors. On hearing that the rap mogul was looking to buy a home in the block, residents issued the star with a set of rules to adhere to - which included not playing any loud music or hosting any wild parties. If its is too loud then you are too old.

Combs, 38, was angered by his neighbors’ pre-conceptions about his lifestyle - insisting he is just a family man when he is at home. He says, “It was offensive to make stipulations based on anything they’d heard about black rappers. Tom Cruise is well known for blowing stuff up in movies but no one is telling him not to bring big guns into the joint. ahhahahahahhaahah! Hannibal Lector ain’t cookin up peeps either. Captain Kirk ain’t doin photon torpedos on aliens neither. I personally would not let this tard into my building unless he passed a 3rd grade English test.

“I have six kids and when I’m at home I raise them just like anyone else.” (how many Moms?) Combs’ children include Justin Dior, 14, Christian Casey, seven, Chance Chapman, one, and twins D’Lila Star and Jessie James, one. I say he should play the race card next and get the public behind him. Landlords don’t care about Black people.

RIHANNA has been named an honorary ambassador for culture and youth by her native Caribbean island of Barbados. Yah Mahn! Here’s some bananas mahn! The 20-year-old singer - whose full name is Robyn Rihanna Fenty - was the guest of honor at a tribute rally and concert on Thursday (21Feb08), where Prime Minister David Thompson bestowed her with the title. She says, “I really don’t know what to say. I am so grateful and I have never been more proud to be Bajan.” The island nation’s government will also reward Rihanna’s cultural contributions by giving her “a piece of the rock” - a plot of land in the exclusive Apes Hill area of St James parish. Is Rihanna a possible spy, working for the government? I can smell Patriot Act in the air.

Nicole Kidman is pregnant and she should just be pregnant and content. I wish I could be pregnant. Here she is at the Tokyo premiere of “The Golden Compass.” Nicole also seemed to want to show off her very small baby bump. I can’t believe she’s due in June already. Did she has her lips done? Looks like her lips (on her mouth) will be the ones giving birth, not the ones under her skirt.

Lindsay Lohan and “I Know Who Killed Me” swept the Razzies today winning 8 awards! Lindsay personally took home Worst Actress and Worst Screen Couple (with herself). She has a lot to be proud of! Congratulations Lindsay! Mr. Murphy amassed three Razzies as worst actor, supporting actor and supporting actress for the comedy “Norbit.�? . Here’s the rest of the winners:

Worst Picture: I Know Who Killed Me
Worst Actor: Eddie Murphy, Norbit
Worst Actress (tie): Lindsay Lohan (as Aubrey) and Lindsay Lohan ( as Dakota), I Know Who Killed Me
Worst Supporting Actress: Eddie Murphy (as Rasputia), Norbit
Worst Supporting Actor: Eddie Murphy (as Mr. Wong), Norbit
Worst Screen Couple: Lindsay Lohan and Lindsay Lohan, I Know Who Killed Me
Worst Rip-Off: I Know Who Killed Me
Worst Sequel: Daddy Day Camp
Worst Director: I Know Who Killed Me
Worst Screenplay: I Know Who Killed Me
Worst Excuse For A Horror Movie: I Know Who Killed Me

For her wins, Lindsay Lohan will be awarded with two dazzling gold painted awards valued at $5. I Know Who Killed Me also shattered Razzie records with the most wins (8). Showgirls and Battlefield Earth previously held the honor with 7!

TMZ had been camping out in NYC to get photos and video of Howard Stern and Beth-o and on Monday’s Howard Stern Show on Sirius Satellite Radio, Howard Stern bitched and bitched like a little girl. The TMZ footage showed Beth-O in a store and Howard complaining to the paparazzi about taking his picture. Howard was saying, “Enough guys, another time…..” and they weren’t cooperating. Howard was going to stage all out war against the lady who did the story and vowed to camp outside HER house with a bunch of retards and whackpackers.

Stern, who is in the celebrity gossip business sure hates it when he is on the other end of the paparazzi’s grip. Howard can sure dish it out, but when there’s an ounce of spotlight shining on him, he freaks out like a male diva. So after a 15 minute rant, Howard’s producer, Gary Dellabate tracked down Harvey Levin on the phone and Harvey officially apologized for his crew’s behavior. Harvey basically said that he felt uncomfortable about the footage of Stern and his fiance the day he saw it, and it “bothered him” all weekend long. Harvey is a diplomatic, ass kissing, little, squirmey bitch and Howard Stern fell for it hook, line, and sinker. What a pathetic (possible fake) display of useless garbage. I watch TMZ everyday and frankly I don’t understand how that little Napolean bastard from the People’s Court got to where he is in this business. He stands up at the board and his lowly paid reporters throw ideas at him with the hopes of getting a Harvey ‘bread crumb’ smirk or ’seal of approval’. The show is great, I like the video transitions and sound effects. My only problem is with Harvey Levin. Harvey is just no better than the scumbag lawyers that chase ambulances…..atcually he is the same…he chases stories and makes mountains out of molehills….kinda like what we do. I guess we are just jealous of TMZ :)

Harvey Levin Picture

Jimmy Kimmel gave his response to Sarah Silverman’s “I’m Fucking Matt Damon” video by “Fucking Ben Affleck.” He raised Sarah by getting almost every damn celebrity into his video. Seriously, Brad Pitt, Rebecca Romjin, Harrison Ford, Christina Applegate, Cameron Diaz, Macy Gray, Joan Jett, Don Cheadle, Pete Wentz, Josh Groban, Perry Farrell, The Madden douches, Dominic Monaghan, Robin Williams, Huey Lewis and many more were all in this shit. They should have kept the Diaz out. I almost turned that shit on as soon as she came on the screen with her usual schtick. You gotta love these guys working the You Tube angle and getting a shitload of views, exposure, and laughs.

Matthew McConaughey is feeling the pressure to marry his pregnant girlfriend Camila Alves. While Matthew, who has just gotten used to the idea of becoming a father, he’s getting ultimatums from Camila, her mother, and his own 77-year-old mom. Time to stage a fight, throw your penis back in your pants, put your shirt on and run to zee hills! Camila’s hoping that a change of climate on Matt’s newest movie set may help him change his mind. RUN MATTHEW RUN! RUN MATTHEW RUN! Go talk to George Clooney, Matt.

Matthew McConaughey Getting Married

In one of the more bizarre red carpet moments in the last… well, ever, Gary Busey stormed the proceedings and scared the holy bejeezus out of Jennifer Garner in the process. This guy better get banned for his antics.

As Jennifer and Best Actress nominee Laura Linney were stepping forward to be interviewed by Ryan Seacrest on the E! pre-Oscar show, the former Oscar nominee (and current horror movie come to life) Gary yelled, “Ryan Seacrest! I’ve been looking for you for years!” You should have tried looking in the closet. As the TV personality’s head whipped around to see Gary coming toward them, both actresses tried to move away but were quickly engulfed as he showered them both with hugs and kisses before wandering off to terrorize someone else.

After a nervous Jennifer (who really could have used the protection of her husband, Ben Affleck) finished her interview, Ryan told co-host Giuliana Rancic, “I don’t even know how to explain what just happened and the terror on Jennifer Garner’s face when that went down.” Then, when Giuliana asked if he had ever met Gary before, Ryan answered. “Never in my life.”

Sometimes, it’s the little moments that make Oscar great, no? I would have loved to see Ben Affleck kick Busey’s ass all over the place and make him bleed red on the red carpet. This news item seems to be the #1 item on the blogs today. Check out the Gary Busey video below:

While she is yet to confirm her pregnancy, Angelina Jolie left no doubt that she’s eating for two at Saturday’s Spirit Awards, where the sexy star proudly displayed a significant baby bump as she posed on the red carpet with long time love, Brad Pitt. Let’s hope it is from the sperm of Mr. Pitt.

Wearing a black, form-fitting satin dress that did nothing to hide the Oscar-winner’s swollen belly, this had to be Brangelina’s unofficial way of announcing to the world, “We’re having a baby.” Now I see said the blind man.

A witness tells OK!, “Angelina looked about four months along.” Let’s see what color the baby comes out. Maybe she is holding an African Chief’s bun in the oven. Now that would be news! Maybe Brad Pitt could star in the sequel, Me Myself and Irene 2 where the main character raises black children that were in fact not from his sperm.

Angelina Jolie Pregnant Again With A Black Baby?

Move over Val Kilmer, the Gladiator is now the Flabiator! Russell Crowe is not looking too healthy here coughing up a lung and catching his breath. Maybe he is bulking up for Celebrity Fit Club or the next season of the Biggest Loser. Every time I see him in a new movie, his face gets fatter and fatter. His eyes seem to be getting less visable by the month. Hit the gym, Mate! Gidday!

Russell Crowe Fat

Actress Denise Richards has defended her decision to allow her children to appear in her new reality TV show, insisting they want to become stars. The former Bond girl was taken to court by ex-husband Charlie Sheen in a bid to stop their daughters Sam, 3, and Lola, 2, from appearing on television. What ever happened to the allegations of Charlie Sheen molesting his kids? How did this get swepped under the rug? Looks like the Hollywood Mafia got involved. But a Los Angeles judge ruled in Richards’ favor and gave her the green light to feature the kids in the currently untitled program. I have a title, it’s called the Crazy Bitch Chronicles.

Here’s some quotes from the C-Word:
She says, “I am a single mom and I am very hands-on with my kids, so I can’t do a show without the kids at all. “I asked them if they wanted to be on TV and Sam said, ‘Yes!’ My girls have been around it so much. They love the makeup. They love the hair. They love all of that. She probably asked them while waving some chocolate in the air for the bribe,
“I understand why people are judgmental right away, saying, ‘How could she have her kids on the show?’ But as long as they’re protected, I feel that they’ll be OK.”

When I die and go to hell, this TV show will be playing, I can guarantee it.

Best Picture: No Country for Old Men

Best Director: Joel Coen and Ethan Coen (No Country for Old Men)

Best Actor: Daniel Day Lewis (There Will Be Blood)

Best Supporting Actress: Tilda Swinton (Michael Clayton)

Best Supporting Actor: Javier Bardem (No Country for Old Men)

Best Original Screenplay: Juno (Diablo Cody)

Best Original Song: “Falling Slowly�? (Once)

Best Picture: No Country for Old Men

Best Director: Joel Coen and Ethan Coen (No Country for Old Men)

Best Actor: Daniel Day Lewis (There Will Be Blood)

Best Actress: Marion Cotillard (La Vie en Rose)

Best Original Screenplay: Juno (Diablo Cody)

Best Documentary Feature Film: Taxi to the Dark Side

Best Documentary Short Subject: Freeheld

Best Original Score: Atonement

Achievement in Cinematography: There Will Be Blood

Best Original Song: “Falling Slowly�? (Once)

Best Foreign Language Film: The Counterfeiters (Austria)

Honorary Oscar Recipient: Robert Boyle

Best Film Editing: The Bourne Ultimatum

Best Actress: Marion Cotillard (La Vie en Rose)

Achievement in Sound Mixing: The Bourne Ultimatum

Achievement in Sound Editing: The Bourne Ultimatum

Best Adapted Screenplay: No Country for Old Men

Best Supporting Actress: Tilda Swinton (Michael Clayton)

Best Animated Short Film: Peter and the Wolf

Best Live Action Short Film: Le Mozart de Pickpockets

Best Supporting Actor: Javier Bardem (No Country for Old Men)

Achievement in Art Direction: Sweeney Todd: The Demon Barber of Fleet Street

Best Visual Effects: The Golden Compass

Achievement in Makeup: La Vie en Rose

Best Animated Feature: Ratatouille

Best Costume Design: Elizabeth: The Golden Age

Hollywood actor HAYDEN CHRISTENSEN will not take part in any future STAR WARS movies - because the sci-fi franchise stifled his creativity. Wow what a ballzy move from a nobody! This kid couldn’t act his way out of a wet paper creative bag. Try to find an interview of this idiot….he says “UM” every fourth word, he looks like he is on methadone, and he looks like a retraded Hugh Jackman. Screw Hayden! You will leave the franchise when the Almighty George Lucas says you can…not when you say!The Jumper star played Anakin Skywalker/Darth Vader in the final Star Wars trilogy - but he has vowed never again to work with director George Lucas on big budget sci-fi projects. He tells New York Daily News, “It wasn’t necessarily anything you could feel good about creatively. It’s not why you become an actor, to do stuff like that.” In 7 years when Hayden is buying crack or signing autographs outside Mann’s Chinese theatre in Hollywood, we’ll show him his dumb ass quotes.

OMG! Avril Lavigne is so hot and pretty. How I wish she is my “girlfriend”…hehe that deep cleav…hmmmmm yummy LOL She really rocks!!!

Pop star AARON CARTER has been arrested for drug possession in Texas. La la la la la! Don’t mess with Texas! The 20-year-old was pulled over by cops after he was spotted speeding in Kimble County at around midday on Thursday (21Feb08). I drove through Texas once and got 3 tickets all within 7 hours. Then I never paid the tickets, had a warrant out for my arrest, and the tickets went to collections. Don’t mess with Texas!

According to TMZ, a subsequent search of the singer’s Cadillac Escalade turned up less than two ounces (56.7 grams) of marijuana and he was taken to a local jail in the town of Junction, where he is currently behind bars. I bet the Brokeback cowboys in prison are lovin that pretty boy up every-which-way but Tuesday. YEEEEEEEEEEEEEHAAaaH!