Dam I heard a rumor today that there is an elisha cuthbert sex tape on the loose. I have not seen any pics from it but I hear that the tape will be released in the next two weeks. I sure hope its real. She has always been a hottie and I would love to see her totally naked and scewing. Anyone know who the guys is supposed to be? I have not heard this part.

Mariah Carey Has a Prenup
Mariah Carey yes, she’s married, it’s confirmed, it really happened down there in the Bahamas. More importantly: Miss Mariah and Mr. Cannon have a very nice prenuptial agreement.

Jury Convicts Fan of Stalking Uma Thurman
A lovesick former mental patient was convicted Tuesday of stalking and harassing Uma Thurman for more than two years, showing up on her front doorstep and movie set and sending the actress a series of creepy love letters. Is ‘creepy’ a legal term? Maybe her giant oversized bug eyes were asking for it?

Gwyneth Paltrow: ‘Everyone Has the Wrong Idea’
Gwyn plays a superhero sidekick in ‘Iron Man’ and she can’t believe people are surprised at seeing her in a sci-fi adventure flick. No, Gwen, everyone at Starmuscle.com is surprised that you are cast in ANY movie, not just Iron Man. You were the weakest link in that movie.

Rosie O’Donnell Likes Rev. Jeremiah Wright’s Message
Rosie O’Donnell defended Rev. Jeremiah Wright on the ‘Today’ show on Monday, saying Barack Obama’s former pastor ‘made sense to me.’ Good ole’ Rosie. The comedian also compared herself to Wright, saying “some people confuse passion for rage.” She also came to Wright’s defense on his views on the origins of AIDS. Rosie is blogging a little too much and believing all these internet coinspiracy theories.

Britney Spears Granted Expanded Visitation Rights
Britney Spears was granted expanded visitation rights to her two sons on Tuesday during a child-custody hearing. Good luck Brit, we are all pulling for you.

Lindsay Lohan Photographed In Lost Mink Coat
A New York coed is demanding $10,000 after actress Lindsay Lohan was photographed allegedly wearing the student’s mink coat, which disappeared in January after a night of clubbing. We heard that Lindsay was broke, maybe she has been hanging around that Winona Ryder and picked up stealing.

Robert Blake Challenges $15M Award in Damages of His Slain Wife
Robert Blake’s lawyer asked an appeals court to reconsider its decision ordering the actor to pay $15 million in damages to the children of his slain wife, Bonny Lee Bakley. Why won’t this whack-job go hide under a rock and just leave us alone?

‘Superbad’ Leads MTV Movie Awards Nominations
The nominees for MTV Movie Awards are chock full of nerds. The celebration of mediocrity in our society and rewarding underachievers is ruining a new generation. Starmuscle.com is boycotting the MTV Movie Awards for this reason.

Tom Cruise May Star in Next ‘Mission Impossible’ Movie
Entertainment mogul Sumner Redstone said Tuesday he has no objection to Tom Cruise starring in the next segment of the popular “Mission Impossible” movie series, despite cutting his relationship with the actor in 2006. It’s great to see that people can put aside their personal differences for the sake of business and the fans.

Vanessa Williams to Receive Bachelor of Fine Arts Degree
Nearly 25 years after leaving Syracuse University, Vanessa Williams will get her bachelor of fine arts degree this weekend. Wow, that Ugly Betty show does still have some pull. I thought it fizzled off the map.

‘Project Runway’ May Leave Bravo, But NBC to Keep Producers
“Project Runway” may switch from Bravo to the Lifetime cable network this fall, but NBC Universal ensured Monday that the show’s producers won’t go with it. Lifetime last month announced it had agreed on a $150 million deal with the Weinstein Co., owners of “Project Runway,” to televise five seasons of the cable hit starting in February. NBC Universal has tried to block that move in court.

Lindsay Lohan is set to make a guest appearance on hit U.S. TV series Ugly Betty. Rumors surrounding the Just My Luck star’s role in the show emerged last week and suggested she had signed up to eight episodes of the program - but Perez Hilton reports the singer/actress will appear in the show’s season finale, after she was photographed on the set of Ugly Betty in Los Angeles on Saturday. It follows Britney Spears’ well-publicized performance on sitcom How I Met Your Mother last month - her guest appearance helped the show earn its highest ever ratings, and she will make a return to the sitcom later this month. WEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!

Here’s some other stars that will be doing some appearances on tv shows:

Nicole Richie on the ‘Biggest Loser’.

Rachel Ray on ‘Hells Kitchen’.

Dr. Phil on ‘Are you smarter than a 5th grader?’.

Zach Braff on ‘Beauty and the Geek’.

Tori Spelling on ‘Dr. 90210′.

Howard Stern’s penis on ‘Smallville’.

Oprah Winfrey on ‘Two and a Half Men’.

Ron Jeremy on ‘Grey’s Anatomy’.

What is this old broad trying to be hip? Is there now going to be a Barbara Walters sex tape? This golden girl sure loves the attention: Here’s the story: U.S. broadcaster Barbara Walters has confessed to a passionate affair with a married senator during the 1970s - but she ended it after it almost destroyed her career. In her upcoming memoirs, Auditions, Walters admits to an affair with former Massachusetts Senator Edward Brooke following the breakdown of her two previous marriages. Walters claims Brooke, the first black member of the U.S. Senate since Reconstruction, was so in love with her he told his wife he wanted a divorce. But when his wife tried to reveal the affair to the National Enquirer, the couple ended the relationship. She writes, “I slowly began asking myself if we could ever be married. Would such a marriage destroy his career? Would it destroy mine?” The 78-year-old also writes about Star Jones’ “lies” and Rosie O’Donnell’s “diva-like” antics. Is this a big story because it was a taboo interracial affair? I wonder if she thinks Barack Obama is the shiznit?

SONNY Bono, former husband and singing partner of superstar Cher, was clubbed to death by hitmen on the orders of drug and weapons dealers who feared he was going to expose them, a former FBI agent claims. Then it was weekend at Bernies and they threw his corpse down a ski slope and in the direction of a tree.

Ted Gunderson, now a private investigator, has told the US Globe tabloid that Bono, who served as mayor of Palm Springs for four years, did not die after hitting a tree on a Nevada ski slope in January 1998 as everyone believed.

“It’s nonsense for anyone to now try to suggest that Bono died after crashing into a tree. There’s zero evidence in this autopsy report… to show such an accident happened. Instead, there’s powerful proof he was assassinated.

“This was an evil plot that was carried out to almost perfection by ruthless assassins,” Mr Gunderson told the paper. An “EVIL PLOT” hahahahahaha! Maybe it was for 1 million dollars!

The former agent, who has been researching Bono’s accident for the past decade, said top officials linked to an international drug and weapons ring feared the singer-turned-politician was about to expose their crimes - so they had him killed on the slopes. I can smell a straight to dvd movie.

Bono, an experienced skiier, was ambushed on the slopes by hired hitmen, who beat him to death and then staged a tree collision, Mr Gunderson said.He called for authorities to dig up Bono’s remains and open a homicide investigation. His claims have reportedly been backed by top forensics experts who fear Nevada authorities were too quick to call the death a skiing accident.

Investigator Bob Fletcher had also confessed he sent evidence of a 10-year study that linked top US government officials to arms and weapons dealers to Bono less than a month before his death, the Globe reported.

“(Bono) was going to make it his No.1 priority… There’s no doubt in my mind Sonny was murdered by someone who needed him silenced,” Mr Fletcher told the paper. Cher has not returned Starmuscle.com’s phone calls. Matlock, Kojack, and Perry Mason have all been taken out of retirement to investigate the case. David Curuso will be the lead investigator on the case.

Tom Cruise has confessed he was “wrong” for attacking pal Brooke Shields and other depressed new mothers who turn to medication to beat postpartum depression. IF this is the news from the wire, then it is even getting more spun than I expected. The movie star hit the headlines when he criticized Shields for publicizing anti-depressants in her book Down Came the Rain: My Journey Through Postpartum Depression in a 2006 TV interview. He has since personally apologized to the actress for his remarks and now admits he regrets the comments he made, insisting he was wrong to suggest postpartum depression could be controlled by taking nothing stronger than vitamins. In an exclusive interview with Oprah Winfrey, which was taped at his Telluride, Colorado estate for last Friday’s Oprah show, the movie star said, “It came out wrong, it’s just not true. I was raised by four women who have children and babies. I’m not trying or want to tell anyone how to live their life or what they should believe or shouldn’t believe.” Cruise went on to say he felt “pressed” by the media during that period of his life - and regrets saying a lot of things on TV. He added, “I felt like I could’ve handled it better,” admitting he regrets discussing Shields at all. This interview was well rehearsed, and a little robotic. At times you could see veins popping out of his head.

Miley Cyrus is taking issue with a photo of herself that’s going around, and it’s not another amateur, truth-or-dare Internet snapshot — it’s the handiwork of Annie Leibovitz. HMMMM. That evil photographer, coercing the poor Diney girl. Shame on you….hahahahahah!

“I took part in a photo shoot that was supposed to be ‘artistic’ and now, seeing the photographs and reading the story, I feel so embarrassed,” Cyrus said Sunday in a statement through her publicist. “I never intended for any of this to happen and I apologize to my fans who I care so deeply about.”

The photos, appearing in the upcoming issue of Vanity Fair, were taken by Leibovitz, a renowned celebrity photographer whose edgy, silver-toned portraits have included subjects such as Angelina Jolie, Scarlett Johansson and a naked, pregnant Demi Moore.

The Cyrus pictures accompany an interview with the 15-year-old pop star and her father, singer Billy Ray Cyrus. They include shots of the teen wrapped in what appears to be a satin bedsheet, looking over her shoulder with her back exposed.

The Disney Channel, which airs Cyrus’ TV show “Hannah Montana,” was also critical of Vanity Fair. (Yeah they didn’t know….come on!)

“Unfortunately, as the article suggests, a situation was created to deliberately manipulate a 15-year-old in order to sell magazines,” a network statement said.

A phone message left for a Vanity Fair representative was not immediately returned Sunday night. But in a statement to the TV show “Entertainment Tonight,” Vanity Fair defended its position.

“Miley’s parents and/or minders were on the set all day,” the magazine said. “Since the photo was taken digitally, they saw it on the shoot and everyone thought it was a beautiful and natural portrait of Miley

This is not going to end here! This is a scandal I can smell it.

We’ll keep you posted.

Miley Cyrus Vanity fair Pictures

Man-o-man, John Mayer lands some HIGH END TAIL! Actress Jennifer Aniston has sparked speculation of a new romance with rocker John Mayer, after the pair was spotted dining together in Miami, Florida on Friday The Rumor Has It star met Mayer at Michael’s Genuine Food & Drink, where they enjoyed a mid-afternoon meal. The two stars were locked in conversation for 90 minutes, and sat with their heads close together, according to the eatery’s general manager Charles Bell. They even shared their food - Aniston “ate some of” Mayer’s ham sandwich, and they split a chocolate dessert. But Bell is refusing to fuel rumors on the nature of their relationship. He tells People.com, “I was happy to accommodate them. I can’t speculate on what kind of meeting it was, but they looked happy and seemed to have a great time.” Star Muscle has also learned that Aniston has had some of her eggs frozen since her biological clock is a ticking. Maybe John Mayer could write a catchy song about ‘fryin’ up sum eggs….MMMM YEAH’.

Disney sensation Miley Cyrus is now officially the wealthiest child in the world - she is reportedly set to be a billionaire by the year’s end. Raking in $18 million in 2007 alone, the 15-year-old singer/actress has climbed her way to the top of a list of Hollywood’s richest kids, with her Hannah Montana franchise estimated to be worth $1 billion by 2009. A spokesperson for Disney says, “Kids are earning more and more and can command huge fees in Hollywood. But no one could have predicted how popular Miley would be. She’s a true star.” Cyrus’ mother Leticia adds, “A lot goes into her investment fund, which she can’t touch until she’s 18.” The teen hit the headlines earlier this week when it was announced she had signed a seven-figure deal with the Disney Book Group to write her autobiography, slated for a spring 2009 release.Let’s hope she stays off the crack pipe like all these other stars and doesn’t start flashing her coochie coochie all over town. These Disney kids really live the fast lane and crash HARD.

Wesley Snipes gets 3 years for not filing tax returns. Mr. Snipes, who was convicted in February, received one year for each count, to be served consecutively, and an additional year of probation. The sentence was handed down by Judge William Terrell Hodges of Federal District Court. “He never stated he didn’t pay his taxes or show any remorse for it,” said Robert O’Neill, the acting United States attorney for the Middle District of Florida, the lead prosecutor on the case. Didn’t this guy make up to $100 million dollars in the 1980’s and 1990’s? Where did all this money go? Mr. Snipes even tried to make a down payment on his taxes before sentencing; his legal team offered Judge Hodges three checks totaling $5 million. Judge Hodges refused the checks, saying he did not have the authority to accept them. Prosecutors also declined to accept the checks. An Internal Revenue Service employee eventually accepted the checks on behalf of the Treasury Department. A member of Mr. Snipes’s legal team said they would appeal. “We were hoping for a complete acquittal,” the lawyer, Linda Moreno, said. “I have faith in the process, and I have faith in the jury system. We will appeal.” If I were Wesley I would have used some of that money and hired a better lawyer. He paid 5 million and THEN it didn’t mean anything? THEN he goes to jail. HHAHAHAHHAHHHAHHAHAHHAHAhAhH, Will Wesley become a fugitive? Stay tuned at starmuscle.com

update: Wesley Snipes has requested he be allowed to serve his three-year prison sentence at a facility near his New Jersey home. The Blade actor was handed the term by Florida judge Judge William Terrell Hodges after he was convicted of failing to file his taxes for five years. His legal team have asked the judge and prison officials to house him in a federal prison as close to his home as possible - and officials have vowed to accommodate his wishes. Bureau of Prisons spokesperson Felicia Ponce says, “We try to house inmates within 500 miles of their residence so they can maintain ties with their family and community.”

Troubled pop star Amy Winehouse has been cautioned by British police after confessing to allegations of assault. The hitmaker, 24, is reported to have head-butted a man outside a pub in Camden, north London in the early hours of Wednesday, after a boozy night out. Winehouse was arrested on suspicion of assault on Friday when she voluntarily turned herself in to authorities at London’s Holborn Police Station to be quizzed about the incident. She was held in custody overnight after a doctor ruled she was “in no fit state” to be questioned. But, after explaining her actions to police on Saturday morning, she was released without charge. Her publicists must have paid the man off that she head butted. How much friggin money does this chick still have after that one hit wonder!? I can’t believe she isn’t homeless yet.

Finally a site that is not caught up in trying to screw you. Remember when the internet was not a scam, trying to get you to pull out your credit card? This site is bringing the FREE back.

Retards.com was recently acquired and needs people to start posting at their forum. Are you sick of annoying Google Ads, Spyware, Popups, Blind Banners, and other nonsense that locks up your browser? Retards.com is free of ads, no BS. Chat about anything you want. Get a hardlink in your sigfile at a premium domain name. Tell your friends, check us out! WEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE. There are plenty of funny pictures , funny news , and retarded chat. We plan on adding a tube site, karaoke radio station, free blog hosting, ecards, photo morphing, and much much more. We need people to post their funny email forwards right here so that we can create the largest database of funny stuff. Please tell a friend and add us to your favorites, social sites, link lists, and any other site that will list us.

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Lovely Christina Milian very cute and hot in that black dress at US Weekly Hot Hollywood Party at Beso Resturant in LA. So lovely…..

Ashlee Simpson is reportedly pregnant. The ‘Autobiography’ singer and Jessica Simpson’s younger sister, who recently announced her engagement to Fall Out Boy rocker Pete Wentz is said to be expecting her first child in October. Both are hoping to tie the knot before Ashlee’s
tummy gets larger.